The last Tuesday of each month we invite the Community to come to our FREE Monthly Online Grief Talking Circle from 6-7pm via Zoom link and join Claudia Faerber our Bereavement Volunteer to discuss various topics to support and help navigate your grief journey. This invitation is open to anyone in the Community whether your loved one was on our service or not. We strive to create a safe, sacred space to be seen, heard and validated as you navigate your way through grief. We acknowledge that grief is unique to the individual and encourage all who attend to show up just as you are.
RSVP via email grief@topkare.com to receive the registration link to sign up and get access to the zoom link to attend this event.
*This is not a substitute for therapy and if you are seeking grief therapists please reach out to our Bereavement Coordinator Rebekah Finn 858.833.0546 as she can provide resources.
*Note it isn’t a requirement to bring your ideas and share on the specific topics each month. You are welcome to come as you are sharing your grief story with the group and participation is not required. We also welcome and provide space for participants to just be with their grief in community without sharing. All grief is welcome. Our goal is to create a safe and confidential container for all who join.
Here is a snapshot of our monthly topics so you can Save the Dates on your calendar and plan ahead if certain topics spark your interest.
January - Grief Surges
They can come out of nowhere, but if you've experienced deep grief, you likely have encountered Sudden Temporary Urges of Grief (STUGs) In this month's talking circle we'll discuss how grief surges appear and how you are able to move through them, understanding that they are part of living with grief.
February - Feeling Guilty when You Feel Better
Life after loss introduces many challenges, and one that is common happens right when we have a moment when we laugh at a joke or we find joy while watching our pets at play. That feeling that we should never enjoy again can bring feelings of guilt that we are still here, while our loved one isn't. This can also happen with other losses that aren't about death, like the end of a career, a home, or any number of other debilitating losses. This month we'll talk about feeling guilt and ways we can move through it so that we can find joy in life's simple pleasures.
March - Quotes on Grieving
Many of us find moments of great inspiration from writings on grief. This month, come share pieces of writing or quotes that have helped you in your grief.
April - Staying in the Present while Experiencing Anticipatory Grief
When we are preparing ourselves long before a loss occurs, often we start grieving the inevitable. In these times, it's helpful to get present so that you can not only do what needs to be done but also so that you can enjoy the moments you have left with a loved one. This month we will discuss ways to ground ourselves as we navigate anticipatory grief.
May - Kinds of Loss
There are many different events in life that cause us to go into mourning. From the death of a human or pet, a lifestyle change, job loss, relationship endings, or many many other things, it's important to acknowledge the grief without trying to categorize its importance. In this talking circle we'll discuss different kinds of grief and the similarities between them, as well as the differences.
June - Grief Glimmers
We talk a lot about grief triggers, but just as important are those moments when we are struck but hope, a happy memory, or joy in the moment. They are just as powerful, and they are signs that can bring us great comfort. In this meeting we'll discuss those moments of grief glimmers and how they help us in our grief.
Each participant will be allocated a specific amount of time to share whatever they want with the group. Our basic agreements for our gatherings are based off Frances Weller's Book The Wild Edge of Sorrow.
Online Talking Circle Format
6:00 to 6:05
Welcome and 8 Basic Agreements:
1. No advice be given.
2. Practice saying we hear you, or a simple Thank you after some shares. Remember grief is not a problem to be solved but an experience to be witnessed.
3. Deep listening to what the person is sharing.
4. No interrupting or crosstalk.
5. Allow space and breath after someone speaks.
6. Confidentiality, it is important that what is shared in the circle will be held in the circle.
7. Practice revelatory speech-this is a speech that reveals who you are, not how someone should be.
8. Lastly, this space is centered on providing comfort and understanding to one another. For this reason, we ask that you please refrain from promoting personal services or other grief support groups during our sessions.
6:05 to 6:10 Reading, anecdote, or short video clip that sets the tone for the topic of discussion.
6:10 to 6:55 Timed participant sharing. Depending on the number of attendees, we may have breakout groups. Call on participants individually.
6:55 to 7:00 Close the meeting with Topkare’s Mission and Vision Statement.
Claudia Faerber has a long history of grief. From the death of her sister Jacqui at the age of twenty-seven in 1976 to the loss of her mother, sister, best friend, and cherished dog Evelyn from 2013-2015, Claudia has learned about the sacred beingness death and dying. As Carl Jung writes, “Embrace your grief, for there your soul will grow.” The great honor of sitting vigil as her mother took her last breath began a journey into presence in the face of loss that sustains her everyday life. Caludia is a writer, succulent gardener, and movement enthusiast who walks this life with a poddle named Hazel and a Greyhound named Chelsea. She is an INELDA-Trained end-of-life doula and resides in San Diego.